Annie's Love Life Blog

So, we all have people in our lives that we go to for advise. This person is usually older, more expeirinced in dating and finances ect. I have a couple of friends I go to . They are very reliable sources, or so I thought. Come to find out they are just as confused as me. I would never consider myself someone to go to for advise. I am 23, unmarried, I have a five year old, have not finished college and am in debt. But, over the past few weeks I have realized that there is someone who comes to me. Very confused by this I started to look at the situation closely. First of all, Annie we shall call her, is a year (or two) older than I, no kids, with college, her own place (sort of), her own car, her own money, no boyfriend and very pretty, smart and has a lot of potential. I dont understand it? Is this what we do? We go to our friends, who are our friends because we have thins in common with, whether its work, home, hobbies, whatever.We go to these people and ask them for advise as though they are in a position of complete happiness/success/contentment. So, lets go a little farther. Annie is single, she continues to look for "the one" so that she can continue her life on her schedule. So, she gets ll dressed up in a cute skirt with a shirt that matches her newest shoes and her new hand bag to tie it all together. Hair,check. Makeup, check. Outfit ,check. Ass...check (of course).She gathers her bestie and heads out to the club. At the club she doesn't show id because she has taken this road to true love more than once. So, she goes into the club, up to the bar and orders her first of many drinks. When she losens up some she makes her way to the dance floor. Because Annie is Annie she is approached by many guys and in her tipsy stupor she gives out a fake name to the guys she finds unattractive and her real name to the one she likes so that she knows who to remember. So "Joe" calls her the next day and after consulting with her friends about what he looked like Annie agrees to meet him for coffee later. They meet, he seems nice, Annie gets excited and they agree to call each other the next few days to set up a diner date. Now, because Annies friend just ended a six month long relationship with someone she continues to have breakup sex with she comes to me for advise. Now, I have been in a relationship for over a year now, never been married....my ex broke up with me fior a guy and my ex before that I ended because we were engaged for three years and still did not have a date. I suppose on some level I am an ok candidate because Im still with someone. I usually tell her to wait for him to call, and she usually just texts him anyways. Afterwards though she promises to wait for him to call and usually removes his number after writing it down at home on a postie note. (she says to remove the temptation). After about 4 days Annie approaches me again, excited because Joe finally called and they talked for hours. It turns out Joe is such a nice guy. He works for some major corporation, over sees hundreds of employees, lives on his own in one of the nicer neighborhoods, never been married, no kids...basically the one she thought was "the one." Over the next week they go out for diner and a movie, she hangs out with his friends, he hangs out with her friends. Annie believes everything is going wonderfully and begins to get more attatched. They have talks and he tells her he doesn't want anything serious, she tells me its getting serious. At six weeks she is ready to be fully committed and he disappears. For a week she wont hear from him, then he texts her saying he is sorry he is out of town. She gets excited again and thinks everything is ok. Then one day, while getting a movie she bumps into Joe and his pregnant wife while he is waiting for his ex wife to drop his kids off so he can take them all back home for dinner that his mom just finished cooking. It also turns out he lost his job from Burger King for being late so often and is currently unemployeed. Since she is already at Blockbuster she decides to 'bump' into hwe ex "John" and invite him over for movies and ice cream. I then recieve a text message saying "John" stood her up. At this point I am so confused because I though John was Joe and Joe worked at Blockbuster and where is Johns wife again??? Now, let me remind you, Annie is a hottie, with a college degree, living on her own, fun, nice, no kids, and this is what she asks me about....should he ask John or Joe to her brothers two weddings? So, I began thinking...is this what it always looks like? Are we, as women, sinking and settleing for less that what we deserve because Joe Blow blew us off? And, are all the guys Joe Blows underneath to some degree and we just don't realize it? After all, any guy you talk to, no matter how long you have been with them will admitt to checkin out other girls while committed to there well off girlfriends while they are at work with the guys. So, this brings me to another point. Who are our "committed" guys committed to? When they are with us its all about us, but what about when they are with the guys. They openly joke about other girls when we are there, but how far does it really go when we are not around? Is Annie not unlucky in love or is she just the one who catches the guy in the act before she gets too attatched? Is the person Annie goes to just blinded by undeserving trust in a guy who is doing the same thing, just better at not getting caught? And if he is not getting caught doing that, what else is he getting away with?